Is Chasing Work-Life Balance Really Just Keeping You Burnt Out?
How quickly time passes. Two years ago, I wrote a post on this very subject, and looking back now, I’m struck by how much my perspective has shifted. What I believed then and what I understand now feel worlds apart. Growth has a way of reshaping the way we see things we once thought were certain. If you’d like to revisit that earlier piece, Unveiling the Myth: Work-Life Balance, I’ve linked it here so you can take a peek and notice the contrast for yourself.
Work-life balance is something we are told to strive for. We see, read about it and hear about it everywhere! In workplace seminars, on social media, and in countless self-help books. The message is always the same: if you are tired or struggling, it is because you have not balanced things well enough. Balance becomes the cure-all we are supposed to master, and when we cannot, we quietly blame ourselves for being inefficient or not as good as Paul or Jane.
Believe me, that's not the case. There's a bit more to it than you've considered, and it's important to reflect on the nuances. Stay with me on this, as we explore the facets together.
I tried balance once. I told myself that if I scheduled carefully, if I gave equal attention to work, family, writing, workout, and rest, everything would finally feel a bit simpler and fall into place. Instead, I found myself more exhausted than before. Balance became just another job, and another performance I had to keep up with.
The truth is that life does not move in perfect symmetry. There are seasons where work will demand more, seasons where family requires the larger share of us, and seasons where we need to step away and rest. Balance suggests we can carry everything in equal measure, all the time. What I have learned is that balance is not the goal. What matters is knowing where to lean in a given season and giving ourselves permission to let other things wait.
Chasing balance often fuels burnout more than it prevents it when you don't understand that there is more to what it means. In its basal, work-life balance understanding, it keeps us juggling instead of deciding. It results in us rotating responsibilities when the healthier choice might be to set one down and focus on the other. Living with balance means allowing priorities to shift. It means recognizing that we are not failing when life tilts toward one area more than another. We are simply living in rhythm with what matters most right now.
So instead of asking, “How do I balance everything?” I now ask, “What deserves my attention in this season?” That question feels simpler, and gives me clarity instead of guilt when I am unable to perfectly balance ten million things in a week, or a month.
When I say balance is a myth, I mean our view of what it is and how it should function is incorrect, which influences our expectations and leads to larger problems. We should realize that tilting is factual and a normal part of life. Sometimes, deciding where to lean is the most liberating choice we can make.
So if work is demanding more of you this season, then let work take priority. Give it the focus it needs so you can meet your commitments without guilt. If life at home requires your full attention, then lean into family and allow yourself to be present there. This is not to say two things cannot matter at the same time; they often do. But we cannot give both our full selves at once.
The idea is not perfect integration but intentional choice. No matter how much we wish we could do everything at the same time, one thing will always carry more importance in the moment. I believe it is far better to give that one thing the attention it deserves, see it through, and then move on. It frees your mind from the constant pull of unfinished tasks. It also frees your hands to carry something new.
But this is not an invitation to abandon everything else while you focus on what feels most urgent. Life rarely allows us to give all of ourselves to one area and nothing to the others. Think of it the way you might think about paying off credit card debts. You put the bulk of your energy toward the card with the highest interest because it matters most in the long run. At the same time, you still make the minimum payments on the others. You don’t neglect them completely; you simply give them what’s needed to keep things stable while you work through your priority.
Life works the same way. In one season, you may pour most of your attention into work or family, but the other parts of your life still need small, steady touches. A quick check-in with a friend. A few minutes of exercise. An evening to breathe. These may not take centre stage, but they prevent the rest of your life from slipping into neglect. Prioritizing doesn’t mean abandoning. It means knowing where to pour most of your energy while keeping the rest afloat.
THIS IS WHERE I LEAVE YOU: Juggling may look efficient, but it is where the fog begins to set in. It is your body’s way of reminding you that it was never built to split endlessly. What it needs is rest, focus, and the grace of doing one thing well before turning to the next.
If this reflection resonated with you, I invite you to listen to the full conversation on my podcast, This Is My Voice. In the episode, I share more about my own experiences with chasing balance, the hidden ways it feeds burnout, and why giving yourself permission to lean into the season you are in can change everything.
You can find the episode on Spotify or wherever you listen to podcasts.